somenonsensewritings x)

He’s been gone from my mind just for some couple of weeks…
But then, just about several hours ago and an hour ago he completely came back to my mind and heart where he was always there…
This morning I glanced at him and mine met his eyes and I was flying for several seconds b4 I couldn’t see him anymore because I was afraid he’d come back.
But about an hour ago I saw him riding his motorbike and, gosh, I couldn’t lie 2 myself! He was so cool. And he’s always gonna be the coolest boy I’ve ever known…

So I started humming several words about dream…trying to make a song…
I stepped to an angkot and while I was in angkot I always thought about his face…his eyes…his everything…

I almost cried when I fell down to the earth…realizing that he’d never be mine and regretting why I let my heart slipped so fast from my grip just bcoz I saw him and met his eyes???

I’m nothing but something in his presence,,,not more…

I’m nothing but dust in his feeling…

I’m nothing, nothing…

Why can’t I let him go,,,I’ve been trying so hard, I’ve tried so hard, I’m trying so hard to forget him.
I really want to say I HATE HIM someday…but what I said was just I HATE HIM…WITH EVERY LOVE IN MY HEART…

What I’ve done is just telling every of my friends that I really hate him. What I’ve done is writing some nonsense writing. What I’ve done is writing poems about broken heart. What I’ve done is just hoping for an illusion…

I’m nothing.

But he’s my everything.

Huhm…
Sometimes I think it’s not good to say
"I’m lonely" coz I think I never be
alone. I have friends and families who
love me BUT now I’m feeling what a real
loneliness is….

Yes,,,I don’t think I’m alone but I need
someone to be here beside me
now,,,cheers me whenever I cry and
doesn’t mind if I put my shoulder to him…

Well, my dream’s too far, yes I know
that but is it wrong if I keep hoping??

I’ve fallen and love and I’VE FALLEN for
sure…but he faded away and left me
here in this dark, long tunnel,,,,

Usually I’m not like this
but…yeah…today, when I SAW HIS
SMILE…I really wanted 2 cry but laugh
at the same time…I know it was just his
fake smile that he often gives me but I
couldn’t lie to myself coz the fact is I
really miss that smile…

And I’ll sacrifice my feeling to see his
smile..

Well, I guess there’s nothin wrong with
me, but one thing wrong is that…why I
can’t forget his smile and forget
everything I saw in him…

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I’d need you there when
I cried
And the days feel like years when I’m alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you’re gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you’re gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you’re gone
The words I need to hear to always get
me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you

When you’re gone…yes, he’s completely
gone…